How Martial Arts Develops Self Control

The Ultimate Guide to how martial arts can develop self control
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Martial Arts Self Control

by Master Luis Auza – Renshi – Shotokan Karate

In this article you will learn:

  • How are Martial Arts and Self Control related
  • A real life story about making a difficult choice
  • How the practice of Martial Arts teaches you Self Control

The Connection between Martial Arts and Self Control

Martial Arts is connected with the ability to learn self control mainly due to a couple of reasons: 1) It teaches you physically how to respond to stress and 2) It calms your spirit and allows your mind to think clearly.

Physical Learning of Self Control

karate kids self control

This is probably the skill that most people expect to learn when signing up with a martial arts studio.  You expect a Martial Arts instructor that can teach your children to improve their behavior  at home or at school.

For the most part, this is true.  Most parents enroll the kids with the hope that this training will develop their behavior so they become better parts of society.

You are correct! Martial Arts can do that.  Constant martial arts training has proven to teach people to be more respectful, and controlled.

However, you should note the only way you can achieve these results is finding the root cause of the issue, and creating a habit that replaces the old ones.

Talking about habits

Identifying habits is the key to how martial arts teaches you self control.  We are creatures of habit, this is how we learn.

For example, when you use the restroom, your first habit should be to wash and clean your hands. Pretty easy right? We do it all the time and it requires little willpower and mental stress.  Not a hard habit to keep, no explanation needed.

On the street, while driving and before switching lanes, one must signal the switch to avoid infuriating other drivers and causing unintended accidents.

You get invited to someone’s party for their birthday, so you usually bring a present, when you sit down for dinner you would remove your hat, etc.

These are ingrained in our society.  So here is a challenging one: What do you do when someone starts yelling at you? 

Do you know what you would do when someone clearly wants to fight you? Have you ever had a person of authority pressuring you to do something you do not like?

Some would say yell back at them, some would say tell them to back off, some would say ignore them all together. These are all right answers  They represent what we, based on our values, would do should you be presented with that situation.

But how do you practice what you would actually do?

Practicing Habits of Self Control

How do you practice what you would do if you were confronted in a situation of stress?

  • Someone is upset at you
  • Someone is pressuring you to act in a way you do not desire
  • You have a real feeling of stress and you perceive you have no choice

The truth is in all of these situations most people tend to think “I would behave this way and that way” but the reality can reveal other outcomes.  Most of the time we do not necessarily act the way we think.

Most of the time, our instincts surprise us.

This is because we do not have built-in habits for these situations.

We are accustomed to eating, walking, driving, sleeping, going to work, school, home, church, etc. and we have specific habits for these situations, but when do we make the time to prepare for the more uncomfortable situations?

karate classes for kids

The bottom line is we have not considered how to train our minds to respond to situations of stress

Unfortunately when that happens, we seem to be highly unprepared.  

Why would you spend so much time thinking about stressful situations or even practicing how you would react if you already have so many other habits you have develop that seem far more important.

the importance of Martial Arts

 

Practicing martial arts constantly is key.

1) Martial Arts, besides teaching your body to be flexible and strong, has built-in situations of stress that help develop these very human habits.

2) The more you practice Martial Arts, the less stressed out you feel when confronted with similar situations.

3) Even when you fail to adapt to all situations, constant practice relieves your stress allowing you to think clearly.

Let’s illustrate these points with a real human story:

 

The Story of Nikhil

We have met many students in our martial arts carreers.  These students, throughout the years,  have shared with us the reasons why Martial Arts has been useful to them, and their loved ones.  One of the stories we remember the most concerns one of our most accomplished students, Nikhil.

Nikhil has been training in Martial Arts since he was a little boy.  He started at the age of 7, and did it mostly for fun.  He never really needed to use karate for any reason other than as a form of exercise.  He lived in a good neighborhood and was mostly a well behaved kid.

One day, when walking around school, Nikhil encountered a group of kids sitting outside campus.  They were there simply sitting outside by the benches, not causing any trouble 

As Nikhil was leaving, these kids noticed him walking by.  One of the them looked at Nikhil and said “hey, I like that belt”, referring to a belt Nikhil was wearing that day that happened to be new and looked very nice.  After thanking the kid for the compliment, he continued on, but the kid had other plans.

Then things escalated

The kid approached Nikhil, physically got on his face, and he proceeded to block his way.  “I like it a lot, can I borrow it?”- said the kid.  Nikhil thought fast about what to do.  This kid was not alone, he had friends with him, but he felt confident that he could take on the challenge since he had been practicing Martial Arts for many years.

To Nikhil, the feeling of confronting multiple people at once is not foreign.  He had to experience this many times when practicing sparring.

At the dojo we practice Sparring against multiple attackers.  When you do that all the time, you develop feelings of confidence.

In a split second he made a decision.  He remained calm, cool and collected, took his belt off and with a smile on his face he gave it to the kid.  “Here you go, just don’t ruin it”.  The kid grabbed the belt and was left stunned.  He was obviously hoping for a fight  but that didn’t happen.

Nikhil smiled, made some small talk and walked back to the school.  As soon as he was back, he spoke to a supervisor who came outside with him to confront the kids.  Nikhil got his belt back, and the kids were reprimanded.  He had successfully defused the situation without any major trouble.

We Never do what we don’t practice

How does this event show his knowledge of Martial Arts? Did Martial Arts really teach Nikhil Self Control?

Yes! Most people get the impression that because we are practicing to strike that we cannot control ourselves when confronted by anger. It is completely the opposite.

Martial Arts has an element that teaches the practitioners to defend themselves physically.  One of the main reasons to practice is getting accustomed to situations of pressure, stress and overall discomfort.  Experiencing these can truly develop your awareness and sharpen your decision-making.

karate kids sparring

Sparring Lessens the Fear of Fighting

Practicing Sparring as a form of sport reduces your fear of fighting.  When you constantly develop this physical skill you learn to deal with real fights.  Your senses sharpen and your instincts revert back to your training so you tend to make less mistakes. 

karate for kids training

training to become a black belt

In order to achieve a black belt you must endure several tests.  Besides learning and being able to demonstrate material, you must submit to rigorous challenges, yelling and screaming, physical obstacles, and many more.  You must challenge any feeling of inadequacy, inability to respond, and fear of failure.  As these issues tend to go away, your ability to handle others gets stronger.  If you can take on a black belt test, nothing can really stop you.

karate kids sparring

Constant Meditation eliminates stress

Martial arts classes relax your mind and spirit.  Doing this more can truly relieve you of stress and feelings of high pressure.  It also unlocks your brain to think clearly.

Conclusions

In the same way that Navy Seals train daily in the ocean to get used to real seaside fighting, Martial Artists train being under pressure-filled situations to be ready for real world. 

Learning to hit back is relatively easy, what takes more work is learning how to smile and talk your way out of a difficult situation while maintianing your cool. You are truly applying Martial Arts when you do the latter.

As Nikhil shared his story with us, he added that had he not been training he probably could have started a fight, and possibly gotten expelled.

This story reminds us the importance of martial arts and how they teach all kinds of things.   It teaches you to punch, kick, block, throw, but most importantly, it teaches you to be more confident. 

Confident people think before acting.  I think most of us can learn from Nikhil.